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Everyone met their ispecial someone through a friend, a cousin, or just had lots of common accquaintances.

And none of them will swipe yes to you unless you're a shirtless demigod in a fully-loaded Lambo aiding destitute children in Habaraduwa.

It's simple really : Old is gold, my lonely langurs.

What beats the newspapers classifieds, original refuge of the lonely hearts club?

Put in an ad in the Sunday papers, make sure to avoid irrelevancies like emotional baggage or sexual preferences, and take special care in mentioning pertinent details like caste and horoscope. Volunteering with the sole intent of trying to find a boo is an awful thing to do.

If you own a patch of land in the boondocks, mention that too. You'd basically be one of the Humanitarians of Tinder, which is the human equivalent of gonorrhea.If this guide has found you a main squeeze, use our Date Night Index for some all-star romancing, and our AHAMU page to find rooms in the city.As always, please forward all wedding invites to [email protected] the only thing we love more than romance is a solid buffet. A veritable smorgasbord of possibly single, possibly eligible young people who either live here or are visiting the country for the wedding. Dating is a minefield filled with disapproving relatives, religious obstacles, time constraints, and plain old lack of choice. Keep in mind that the pool of eligible singles is very very small. If you want to break the cycle, here are your best bets : This is the jackpot.If you catch them instagramming photos of them giving out food packets or "the soulful eyes" of old people, you may want to abort mission. It makes sense on some level - black is slimming and being confronted with the crushing reality of mortality can make you want to seek comfort immediately. The street is a public place, and it is every single person's right to walk it in safety and without intrusion. As a general rule, the bus is used to get from point A to point B. If you see someone reading a book you like, striking up a polite and non-intrusive conversation is nice.